Delhi Belly

There was a post Diwali ritual in my house every year. The entire Diwali month, my parents would binge on mithai and namkeen and then promptly go on something called the General Motors diet. The General Motors diet involves eating a distinct kind of food every day of the week. It could be just bananas on one day, and just boiled vegetables on another day. Basically the parents did not starve, but there is a limit to the number of bananas you can eat in a day. The rest of us, that is me and my brother would feel guilty about eating hearty meals. It was like those TV documentaries, where you end up feeling guilty about having a plate full of rice while people are starving. The good part is, it lasted one week and brother and I managed to lose one kilo in guilt while parents ended up 3 kilos lighter.
The bad part? Those three lost kilos usually came back in two weeks, and they got one extra kilo with them for company.

A very Delhi habit is being on a diet but never giving up the desert. However less we eat, the meal has to be followed by something sweet. So I have seen family and friends drinking sugar free teas which taste like sickeningly sweet boiled water - but we never mess with the post dinner gulab jamun. Though lately the gulab jamun has been replaced by sugar free amul chocolates and ice creams. (High fat and high calorie but no sugar).

One season, post getting Baba Ramdeved, there was an acute shortage of lauki in Delhi. Everyone I knew was drinking 'Lauki ka juice' as a part of the get thin quick plan. I tried it one day, and it made me wish my taste buds were dead and buried. The next season, mom was growing bushes of Aloe Vera since its juice was found to magically melt away weight. When I asked her about the lauki ka juice she said, "Oh that we can have any day now. Lauki got cheaper. Now Aloe Vera you cant get it easily."

You know you are in 2011 when you crib about the lift not working and your six year old tells you, "I always take the stairs (I stay on the 11th floor), its good exercise.'

Gosh I miss the 80's when my parents refused to buy me a Barbie doll (something I did not forgive them for till I was 25) since she looked 'too thin'. In fact, the dolls I played with would be classified as clinically obese in today's time and would need to go on a diet for sure.